Tags: self improvement, spirituality, healing power of forgiveness
Are you a forgiving person? There’s actually the healing power of forgiveness. In our lives, it is inevitable that we have been hurt, angered or deeply pained by some people we’ve encountered. I’ve heard people who exclaimed that “He/she hurt me so much that he/she does not deserve any forgiveness from me!”, or “He can’t run away from what he has done to me!” But scientific study shows that it’s actually not the offending party, but the individual who holds grudges within who pays the price.
It’s like accumulating all the hurt and pain through the years. As time goes by, through years and years of holding the bitterness inside you and not letting the power of forgiveness to heal you, harms your other relationships and deteriorate your immune system. Gradually, what you feel about that person heighten into the rest of your life, slowly becoming a part of your system, adversely affecting your attitude and your perception of others.
Now, imagine yourself being chained to that negative feeling and in a way, to that person for so long—you don’t want that, right? Well, it’s about time to apply the power of forgiveness. But to forgive is not the same as simply excusing the behavior or conduct away.
Nor does it necessitate you to keep yourself in a harmful situation. But what is forgiveness all about? I’ve read a good definition by Dr. Charles Stanley: “Forgiveness is giving up my right to hurt you for hurting me.” The power of forgiveness in reality is releasing yourself from the heavy baggage of emotionally or physically “trying to get even”.
It’s actually a choice—a personal and spiritual decision on your part to finally let go of your plans of vengeance or getting back at someone. At times, reconciliation with “that” individual is likely, yet sometimes, it’s not. Perhaps that person doesn’t want to change, and if you let down your guard, yet again completely, the same thing might take place all over again.
But if reconciling is probable and the other party is agreeable, then you can talk about what happened and maybe create mutual plans for a more harmonious relationship in the future. But a caveat though: steer clear of the “better than you” approach—such as “I’m too perfect and too good for you.
But I still forgive you anyway, even though you’re a nasty soul…” Make sure that you’re also willing to take responsibility for your part you participated in the problem. Perhaps you’ll feel better afterwards but the power of forgiveness won’t let you expect all your bad feelings or emotions about somebody to simply evaporate.
As a matter of fact, the next time you meet him/her, you might find yourself in an emotional confusion which causes you to question if indeed you have forgiven. Just don’t rehash all those past things that occurred. Focus on the positive decision you’ve made right away and tell yourself that after you made that decision, now comes the process of healing—the healing power of forgiveness.
About the author
The author of this article, Amy Twain, is a Self Improvement Coach who has been successfully coaching and guiding clients for many years. Amy recently published a highly successful home study course on how to boost your Self Esteem. Learn more about this Quick-Action Plan and have a Fabulous Self Esteem.
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